Shotgun Start: Talkin' drug tests, Perry, American women - Golf, PGA Tour

1. We almost hate to mention it, since it has become the most toxic, stale and distracting issue to sports fans everywhere, but the drug testing policy on the PGA Tour begins today, July 1. Given the game's honor code, do either of you guys see a player failing a test anytime this year?
Steve Elling	Ross Devonport
It's absolutely possible, but if it happens, I think it'll be an honest accident. Plenty of PGA Tour players don't read the weekly green sheets –- the local rules and regs left in the locker room each week by tour officials -– so there's a decent possibility that some knucklehead will use ignorance as an excuse if he unwittingly tests positive for a banned substance. Unless I miss my guess by a million yards, however, I believe it could be years before anybody tests positive for a banned substance such as steroids. But getting slapped for taking the wrong meds for a head cold? It could easily happen, and that's what worries the savvy players the most. Most of them are paying attention, but some of these guys make baseball players look like brain surgeons.	I haven't checked the list yet, but if caffeine and alcohol are on there, John Daly might as well start sending out resumes right now. I'm sure some of the more nervous folks out on tour have taken something akin to beta blockers on a Sunday when in contention, but I think once this drug policy was announced, they realized it was probably better to miss a few putts and take home a decent check for finishing 10th rather than face the embarrassment of being one of the first people caught. As for steroids, they aren't going to help you much in golf, unless they come up with one that somehow makes you hit the ball straight, too.

2. Does this tune sound familiar, sort of? Kenny Perry said he plans to skip the British Open and instead will play in Milwaukee, an opposite event offering one-quarter of the Ryder Cup points compared to the season's third major. Perry declined to enter British Open qualifying staged in Detroit on Monday, but has almost certainly already secured a spot by virtue of the British's last-ditch tournament money-list (tournaments from Memphis through this week's AT&T) exemption. Why not go?
Steve Elling	Ross Devonport
With Ross being British, I can't wait to see his answer. Then again, it probably won't differ much from mine. Perry, 47, has won twice this year to revive his career, stands fourth on the U.S. Ryder points list (No. 1 on the list, Tiger Woods, isn't playing, so Perry is really No. 3) and has all but officially clinched a berth in the matches, to be held in his native Kentucky. Unless something weird happens with the last-ditch British money-list exemption this week at the AT&T, Perry has locked up a spot in the field for Royal Birkdale, too. So why not go? Who cares if he won in Milwaukee in the past? Woody Austin got torched last year for skipping the British when he was exempt. Perry isn't thinking clearly. Does the U.S. team really want to be represented by a player who didn't play in the first three majors of the year? He wasn't eligible for the Masters, and amid much handwringing, declined to try to qualify for the U.S. Open. By the way, Perry finished 16th or better at the British over a three-year stretch from 2003-06. I really like Perry, and he's an engaging guy, but I hereby nominate him for the first PGA Tour drug test.	Last time I checked, it was quite a long way across the pond to my home country, and with the way Perry is playing on his own soil right now, why the hell would he want to make the multi-hour trek to spend $2 for every pound? As you say, he's pretty much already made the Ryder Cup squad, which is clearly his only goal this season, so simply, his job is done. And who cares if he didn't play in the first three majors? He's showing with his other tourney results that he is clearly the best player on tour right now and they won't be playing strokeplay in Kentucky, anyway. Also, Birkdale is a fine course, but it's no St. Andrews. While some in the R&A might see Perry's snub as a personal insult, the toffee-nosed folks back home, along with myself, certainly won't be complaining when karma comes back to haunt the Americans at Valhalla.

3. Is there any reason to believe the fortunes of women from the U.S. will improve anytime soon on the game's biggest stages? Americans have won six of the past 31 majors after 21-year-old Californian Paula Creamer, who started the final round one shot off the lead, took another huge header on Sunday at the U.S. Women's Open.
Steve Elling	Ross Devonport
Two words: &%@#, no. In fact, the latest semi-trend to take root is international teenagers winning major titles, with Yani Tseng and Inbee Park claiming the last two Grand Slam events at age 19. Park had never won a tournament, even on the LPGA developmental circuit, before last Sunday's U.S. Women's Open victory. Meanwhile, of the U.S. players who have won majors this decade, Meg Mallon, Sherri Steinhauer and Juli Inkster are in their 40s. Young Americans Morgan Pressel and Natalie Gulbis have two wins combined in their careers. Cristie Kerr has been solid with 10 career LPGA wins, but hardly spectacular. It's to the point where the best American hope on the horizon might be promising Florida native Vicky Hurst, 18, who has won three times this year on the developmental Duramed Futures Tour. College hotshots Amanda Blumenherst and Stacy Lewis provide some hope as well. Lewis, in her pro debut, had the 54-hole lead at the Open on Sunday before faltering badly alongside Creamer. Hopefully, the scar tissue will be minimal.	As much of a fan of Creamer's game and her looks as I am (insert pink balls joke here), I have to agree that the future of American women in majors looks pretty bleak. While she won twice earlier this season, Sunday's choke job by Creamer was a debacle and other young Yanks like Morgan Pressel and Natalie Gulbis, haven't exactly lit up the LPGA Tour this season. And as for Michelle Wie ... have you given up on her yet, Elling? I hear Ty Tryon is making a comeback, so hopefully Wie can go hide under a rock for a few years like he did and then try to regain the magic when she can actually string a sentence together without saying 'like' or 'ya know?' every other word.